I had to ask for help.

The morning sickness is hitting me like a ton of bricks today. I noticed when I was lying in bed that if I was on my back, I would start feeling queasy. So I just rolled over and ignored it. By the time I got up, it was hitting me in full force, which kind of surprised me. It usually gets worse as the day goes along, and doesn't bother me at all until later in the afternoon. I knew that eating usually makes me feel better, so I grabbed some leftover beef stew and tried to eat. Tried. It was a huge struggle to even get the food down. It took me a good 15 minutes to eat a bowl.

As I sat there, the nausea just got worse and worse and worse. I realized pretty quickly that it was not getting better, and I went ahead and called out of work. Thankfully it was one of my female coworkers that answered my call and offered to take the shift for me. I don't think the men there are quite as understanding.

After I called work, I broke down and called my midwife. That glorious woman. She told me that there are tons of options for the m/s, the most common being B-6 and Unisom. She told me to eat something small every hour and a half or so...guess I need to invest in some carrots or something so that I don't gain 10lbs in the first trimester! I really want to avoid prescription-strength options for now...it doesn't feel worth it when I'm not actually throwing up. I'm not a medication kinda girl anyhow. I prefer natural options whenever possible. I still am a little amazed that I can be this nauseous and NOT throw up, but I suppose I should be really thankful for that. There are some women on TB that throw up anywhere from 10 to 20 times a day...I can't even imagine.

We have 13 more days until our first ultrasound. Fly, time, fly! I am so, so looking forward to seeing that beautiful baby and that teensy heartbeat. I know s/he is alive and well, but it would feel incredible to actually be able to see it. All the ultrasounds last time were done out of fear and urgency. But this one is scheduled and routine, and that alone feels fantastic.

Today, I am pregnant, and I love my baby.

I love getting off of work early...except when it's because I'm nauseous.

My shift was scheduled to start at 3:00. I ended up heading home around 3:45. The nausea today is the worst I've felt it so far. (Of course, I'm only 5w1d, so there's a good chance it's going to get a lot worse.) I'm glad someone was willing to cover my shift, because I was probably going to end up being pretty useless. It was all I could do to smile and greet people as they walked into the store...all I wanted to do was sit in the floor and cry.

It's odd how I can feel so physically bad, but emotionally good at the same time. This nausea is miserable, and I won't try to pretend I don't feel awful. But it's so mentally reassuring, because morning sickness more than likely = healthy baby. (Or babies. Ya never know!) I will take the nausea with a smile (metaphorically) if it means that this will be our take-home baby.

The biggest concern I'm having right now is how this nausea is going to affect my job. We had planned for me to keep working through most of my pregnancy for the sake of saving as much money as possible. But I was not feeling very functional today, especially for a job that is mostly manual labor. If it gets worse to the point that I'm actually throwing up, I don't know that I'll be able to stay there. That makes me nervous in terms of our financial situation. But I know that God will take care of us, and everything will work out just fine. It always does. :) I'm scheduled to work tomorrow too, so hopefully I will be able to get through the shift without feeling like I'm going to toss my cookies. Wish me luck!

Betas. Finally!

After a long and infuriating process, I finally got my beta results. Here's the tale.

When I got my betas done, I had asked the phlebotomist how long it would take to get my results back. She told me that I should have them that day or the next. (Which would have been Wednesday or Thursday.) Today is Friday, and I hadn't heard anything yet, so I called the lab to check and see what was up. The lady on the phone seemed really surprised that I hadn't heard from my doctor already, and said that the results had been sent to her and I should've gotten them already. So, I called my OB's office. And guess what? They're closed on Fridays.

I was ticked. And I did some ugly crying.

I called the lab back and asked them if there was anything I could do to get my results, and the woman told me that I could go to the medical records office at the hospital, sign off on some paperwork, and have my results that day. So I did. (I was not about to wait until Monday for results from my OB. I'm a paranoid pregnant woman on a mission.) The paperwork was painless, and the lady who helped me was so nice.

So here are the results!
Monday's draw (15dpo)- 699
Wednesday's draw (17dpo)- 1672

Definitely hit the doubling mark that they wanted! I sent the results to my midwife. She said they look good, and she'll check them against her chart of typical betas for those days. From the looking I've done online (shame on me for consulting Dr. Google) that's actually a lot higher than average betas. So hopefully that means I have a nice, strong, sticky baby in there.

MIL, FIL, and BIL are all coming to our place tomorrow to watch the UK game. DH has been cleaning, and I should probably help him, but...meh. Lol. I'm going to cook for everyone tomorrow, so I'm going to tell myself that I'm saving my energy for that. In my defense, I am actually pretty stinking tired today. One of the perks of pregnancy! Definitely worth the symptoms. We are having an epic thunderstorm here right now, so I'm probably not going to sleep terribly well tonight, but hopefully it'll blow through quickly and stop making so much noise.

Antsy.

I really, really want my beta results back. I mean seriously, how long does it take? Some of the women on TB get their results back the same day as their blood draw. I still don't have my results back from the draw Monday, much less Wednesday. I'm not "feeling pregnant" very much today and that makes me scared and anxious, and I just want that solid evidence that things are ok and that I'm just being paranoid.

Hi to all my new followers! I'll try not to disappoint by posting boring, bland, mundane updates. But I can't make any promises; I'm a pretty boring person. ;)

I got to spend the day with my awesome mom today, which is always incredibly fun for me. My mom is my best friend (other than DH) and I can never get enough time with her. We went on an underground river boat tour in a cave, and went to a historic plantation that is supposed to be super haunted. It was way cool...I love anything that is supposed to have a lot of supernatural activity. My dream trip is to visit Waverly Hills Sanatorium in Louisville. It was a tuberculosis hospital in the early 1900s and a good 8,000+ people died there. Gotta be haunted with that many deaths, right? Ahh, the things you would never suspect about me, haha. I look tame on the surface, but underneath I'm a wild ghost chaser. When we were at the plantation, I actually got to meet a guy who used to be a member of the Ghost Hunters team. He owns his own paranormal investigation company now. Think maybe he'd hire me?

Do you believe in ghosts (or paranormal entities of some sort)? If yes, do you think you've ever experienced anything with one of them? I love a good spooky story.

Obligatory anti-SOPA post

If you haven't already signed the petition to stop SOPA and protect our online freedoms, please go here. It only takes a minute.

AmericanCensorship.org

Betas, and a countdown!

I had my first beta draw this morning. Thank heavens for talented phlebotomists. She did have to chase the vein a little, but she found it quickly and got a couple vials full. I have no idea when I'll get my results back, but hopefully it'll be soon because I'm awfully curious! I will go back Wednesday morning for the second draw. Fingers crossed for good numbers. :)

Twenty-four days to my first ultrasound, and I am so ready! If I could move time by sheer willpower, it'd be February 9th already. But I guess I'll have to wait. Maybe I'll get lucky and time will pass quickly. When I was pregnant with Finley, I felt like every day crawled past. But it doesn't seem AS bad this time. Still slow, but more like turtle speed, rather than snail. I'm still dealing with a lot of symptoms, which is uncomfortable, but I am enjoying every bit of it. If this means I'm having a healthy baby, I will take the nausea and then some. For those of you who have had a baby before- did you ever experience intensely dry skin? My legs were so dry that they itched INSANELY bad last night. It literally kept me awake last night and I thought I was going to scratch through my skin to get some relief. Ow.

Work today. Yaaay. I have a note from my orthopedist saying that I cannot squat or kneel, but it's not like they're going to listen to that. I was totally unable to contact HR when I tried. I called the number over and over, and let it ring for three minutes or more every time, and I got nothing. Not even a voicemail that would allow me to leave my name and ask them to call me back. There's part of me that secretly thinks they're intentionally making it hard for me to make complaints. I did a lot of looking online, and there are tons of employee complaints about how their concerns were ignored or overlooked. Somehow, I get the feeling that this might end up being my experience, as well. Somethings gotta give, one way or the other.

Ooooh, pretty!

You know, I genuinely think that some of the best friends I've had were created through online interactions. Some of the women that I've met through The Bump have been solid, loyal, and supportive in ways that "real life" friends never have been. And a good example of that is my beautiful, shiny new blog layout. Thank you so, SO much to Brianna over at Counting Blessings. She was helping me fix some issues with my blog header and ended up giving me a completely new layout. It's gorgeous, and I am SO thankful. Friends like you are hard to come by, sweets. You're an incredible lady.

I'll be four weeks pregnant as of tomorrow! How cool to be reaching that mark again. It was fun telling DH's parents. We just segued it into conversation and let them figure it out...pretty funny. I wish I had been able to film it. MIL told me that she wanted to get the baby a stuffed animal to take pictures with on each monthly birthday, so we ended up going to Build A Bear and making a stuffed bunny. It's the cutest little thing! Long, floppy ears, pink nose, and a little heartbeat that we put inside. We decided to get it a little UK tee shirt (in case we have a boy) and blue and white ear ribbons (in case we have a girl). It was a lot of fun. We also told DH's grandmother. She hugged me and said, "Well, I guess now I can give you those maternity jeans I have for you in my closet!" She had gotten them when I was pregnant with Finley but never got a chance to give them to me. They're full panel blue jeans and I can't wait to need them!

I'm so surprised at how calm I am this pregnancy. I was so paranoid the first time. I stressed about everything I ate, drank, and did. But this time, I guess I realize that being super cautious can't promise you that nothing will go wrong. So I'm just going to live my life and enjoy every single second of it. I'm amazed at how much nausea I've already got, and I'm still stunned at how dark my HPT was. Another friend got her BFP and tested on 10DPO as well, and hers was a lot fainter than mine. For now, I'm having a lot of fun teasing my MIL that it's probably twins. I actually am at a "high risk" for twins because they run so heavily in my family. I get to have an early ultrasound to check for multiples, and it's scheduled for February 9th. Yay! I am feeling very relaxed and peaceful and excited, if not nauseous and sore and incredibly a little grumpy at times. Today, I am pregnant, and I LOVE my baby!

Here we go (again)!

Well, folks, it looks like I'm back on the baby train!

After some peer pressure to POAS yesterday, I figured, "Eh, why not? I've got at least 5 ICs, three FRERs, and a dollar store test. I can afford to waste one." So I PIAC, dipped the cheapie, grabbed it, and prepared to walk back to the laptop. As I walked out of my room, I looked down at the test and though, "Holy crud, I think I'm seeing a line form here." I started getting all trembly and staring the test down. After about three minutes, I was definitely, for sure seeing a line. I ran back to the bathroom and dipped a FRER, and as soon as the control line started to show up, there was a test line right along with it. I started laughing and crying and just saying, "Oh my gosh!" over and over again. I couldn't believe I had just tested at 10dpo and gotten a dark, very clear line. Just...wow.

DH is really excited, and obviously, so am I. My OB is sending me an order for HCG betas, and I am SO excited that I was able to book my midwife again. I was so sure that she was going to be all booked up for September, but she wasn't! Her receptionist/doula actually remembered me, and said she was really excited for me. She's incredibly sweet...hope she's my doula!

I am so incredibly excited and thankful. We prayed so much for this baby. All I can do now is try to stay healthy, not eat everything in sight like I want to, and pray some more. I'm already having morning sickness, which is way different from last time. (And honestly, makes me feel more secure.) My EDD is September 23rd. First ultrasound is scheduled for February 9th. Both my OB and my midwife want me to do an early ultrasound since twins are so huge in my family. And I am not going to complain about getting to see my baby early! I am thrilled beyond words. Prayers, thoughts, and good vibes for a sticky baby would be much appreciated! Also, if you know me in real life or are friends with me on FB, please keep this quiet. We're not planning to announce to the world until after 1st tri.

I need to update.

So here's my update. Exciting, right?

I got rid of my Christmas layout and only had a few hundred issues before Blogger would accept the coding changes. Maybe next time I change the layout, it'll be fully cooperative! Here's hoping. :) I probably won't change it again until a big holiday. (Halloween, most likely.)

The holidays were hectic for us. We did so much traveling! Thankfully it was all within TN/KY, but oh my goodness. I just wanted to sleep in my own bed. We went to my mom's for Christmas day, then back up to DH's mom's for Christmas day night, then back to our house to go to work, then back down to TN for BIL's wedding, then back to my mom's. Our poor little car got so many miles put on it. The wedding was beautiful and very sweet. The food at the reception was great. (Catered by Chipotle!)So now I have a new SIL. Hopefully she and I will like each other more than I like my own sister. (That sounds terrible, but there's a huge story behind it that I won't get into right now. Maybe a future post.)

I've been having problems with my left knee for a while, and I finally found out what the problem is. It turns out my kneecap doesn't sit in the right place, and it has been grinding away the cartilage. Um, ow. So now I have a big, sexy brace that I'm supposed to wear at all times, except when I'm sleeping. My orthopedist told me that I absolutely cannot squat at all, so I figured I needed to talk to my boss. Certain elements of my job require me to squat extremely often. He literally laughed at me and denied that I had any need for accomodations. He told me that if I need to deal with something on the bottom shelf, I can just bend upside down. I had to do a lot of that yesterday, and it made me ill from the blood rushing in and out of my head. Not to mention, it killed my back. So I don't know if I need to speak to HR since my boss is thorougly unconcerned and unwilling to accomodate me. I'm not a confrontational person, and I know that I don't have the guts to argue it out with my boss. Any suggestions? Anyone been in a similar situation?

Hope everyone is having a good new year so far. I've got high hopes for 2012.