The best little flicker in the world.

I had the scare of my life yesterday. Sometime in the middle of the night, I got up to pee and discovered that I was spotting a little. It wasn't red, but it freaked me out anyhow. I cried a little, prayed a lot, and tried to remind myself that brown spotting is ok. I posted on my BMB about it, and the general consensus was to contact my midwife if it turned red. Well...it turned red. And I commenced bawling like a child, thinking that I was losing this baby. I called my midwife, and she gave me the number of an independent ultrasound tech who would do a scan for $100. She warned that at 7 weeks, she didn't think we'd be able to see anything one way or the other.

I decided to call Centennial Hospital in TN, because they have an ER specifically for OB patients. I talked to a lady there who basically laughed in my face when I said I wanted to do an ultrasound to see if there was a heartbeat. She told me that there was absolutely no way I would be able to see the baby, much less a heartbeat, at 7 weeks. I asked if a transvaginal ultrasound would be better and she mocked that idea, as well. She told me the only thing I could do at this point was have betas drawn and hope for the best. Clearly, I did not end this call feeling satisfied. The last thing a pregnant woman who fears a miscarriage wants is to be shot down. And I have seen SEVERAL pregnant ladies on TB posting about seeing the heartbeat as early as 6 weeks via u/s, so I was pretty sure this woman's brain had been replaced with some mashed bananas.

I figured hey, might as well go ahead and call the guy my midwife recommended. (For the record, Centennial had told me that if I did elect to get an ultrasound, it would cost me anywhere from $800-$1200. Ouch.) The second he picked up the phone, he put me at ease. He told me that we absolutely would be able to see the heartbeat and baby at 7 weeks, if there was a heartbeat to be seen at all. He would also be able to check for bleeding around the sac and make sure that everything looked "normal." So I chugged water and we headed down to his place.

By the time we got there, I had to pee so badly that I could barely walk upright. He had me go to the bathroom and let a little bit of the pee out, and then come hop up on the table. Around that time, my mom got there (for moral support) and we got started. He squirted that gel on my stomach and stared at the screen, clicking and measuring and not saying a word. I was terrified. Finally, he looks at me, and says, "Well, we definitely have a very strong heartbeat." I teared up instantly, said "Thank God," and asked him to show me. He zoomed in on the screen and pointed out the tiniest little flicker that I wouldn't have even noticed if he hadn't shown me. He said the heartbeat was around 170bpm and very steady. The baby was actually measuring almost a week behind what I had thought it was, but the heartbeat was great and I'm trying not to dwell on the date confusion. He showed us the yolk sac and the fetal pole, and pointed out different things that indicate that the pregnancy is healthy. He couldn't find even the slightest hint of bleeding around the sac, so we have to assume it's cervical or something. It was the most comforting thing ever to have visual confirmation that our baby is ok. (And equally as awesome to SEE MY BABY. Wow.) Best $100 dollars I've ever spent, by far.

Adjusted due date based on baby's measurements: April 6th. We are so blessed, and I am so relieved.